SHknit

I get such a kick out of the site, You Knit What?? Seriously...What the hell where you thinking?. I would post a pic from there, but the designs they find are so fugly that it would just detract too much from our pretty little site for me to bear! Go see what I mean...Meanwhile...

Both of us Stinkmums knit, but we're a pretty picky duo. As You Knit What clearly illustrates, there is a serious lack of good knit design patterns available. I actually feel the urge to dry heave when I'm flipping through patterns at the LYS. So much of it is of this 30 year outdated, ragg wool, itchy, crunchy, live on a commune with no running water and wearing leaves for maxipads vein. Or else it's wa-a-a-y gimmicky. Just who the hell wants to wear this shit that's on the same level as sweatshirts printed with kittens or Scottish Terriers? I can't think about it anymore, I can feel the vomit rising in my throat...

I have two WIPs right now that are taking very long to complete due to my attention deficit...a Clapotis and a shrug. I haven't had the time nor the energy to finish either one, and whenever I do manage to sit down to knit, one or both of the StinkPuppies or Mr. BigStink come running to interrupt me...they have serious serious cases of knittus-interuptus...but ala Willie Nelson, the WIPs? they are always on my mind.

The shrug is cute, but...it's a shrug...why am I even bothering? Plus, I'm getting the feeling it won't be big enough for my big girl turkey drumstick forearms...it's this one on the right from Suss Designs, and I was totally suckered in by the picture...it looked so cute and it's styled so well. Also, my yarn choice isn't so thrilling to me...the color...the yarn...the way it feels to knit with 9's to obtain gauge...I'm too fucking finicky about the esthetics of the process to see the forest for the trees. Total sucker...big thought balloon over my head with a picture of a donkey's ass in it.

Waiting in the wings is this sweater pattern also from Suss: I haven't picked out the yarn for it yet because I know it will be a long project and will require a lot of yarn to complete. I'm actually not looking forward to it because I tend to get mired down by texture, color, and weight so much that I end up never being satisfied and forever returning yarn like a schizo. The same goes for the Clapotis...not happy with the yarn choice, but forced myself to keep going to overcome my fickleness and now it's too late. I'm too far in to abandon it, thus, onward I must go. I can see that thing's going to felt up and pill like crazy too.

The reason I knit at all is kind of hard to sum up, but it has something to do with the zen-like state I achieve when it's all just flowing off the needles, combined with the thought processes involved...the math, the feeling of building something up from string, creating something...and in the end, if it comes out alright...the admiring of the work and effort with a bit of slap-myself-on-the-back satisfaction, that comes only from creativity for me...It fulfills my creative urges on every level, I guess.

Anyway, getting back to it, due to this continual lack of satisfaction of patterns and yarn selection, I must say that I have knitted very few items to completion. Spinning and dyeing doesn't speak to me, and I'm not experienced enough of a knitter to do my own patterns to date, but one day maybe I will stop bitching and get to it!

Violet

I have two issues of a great magazine called, "Violet". It's a mag dedicated to, as they put it: "Modern family living-You've grown up but you haven't grown old"..and meant for those who are parents, but not of the icky-gooey-ducky- choo-choo train-capture my child's every waking moment in a scrap book-get their photos taken every dumb Hallmark holiday at Walmart-parenting magazine ilk. They have incredible, original artwork and design elements that make each page appear as if a page out of someone's portfolio, and articles that touch on topics that make me want to read the darn thing from cover to cover.

I haven't been able to locate a current issue, so I went to their website to subscribe, and I was bummed to find out that subscriptions are no longer available. I read the Editor's Note (Keki Mingus), which you can read here, and not surprisingly, I got that tingly, "I can relate" vibe. There are so few good media sources out there that I find appealing...so I find it disappointing when a good one folds... Why do all the creative, innovative mags fall to the wayside? Is it because they are creative and innovative?

Sherman?!

This morning on the way to school, my eldest son asked me,
"When are we going to have a third kid?"
I almost drove off the road. I explained that carrying a baby for 10 months in my belly is very hard, and the only way we will add a third child to our family is if we adopt. So he tells me,
"Yeah, I want to be an adopt a baby, and we should name him Sherman."
Where does he come up with stuff? Sherman? For some reason, looking at the name in type reminds me of German Shephard...

I love the post by CStink on how she and Kuukie met, and ultimately came to be. What you don't know, and I am here to reveal to you, is that the two of them make a yummy looking couple, and they procreated themselves two equally yummy looking children. Altogether they form a Happy Yummy Family...sounds like some Japanese saying that you would see printed on a Hello Kitty toy. Good gene pool. (I think my older boy may be harboring a secret crush on CStink's little girl, BTW. He mentioned her name several times last week. When I called him on it, he vehemently denied it though!)

I Heart Robot

When I come across stuff like this, my contemporary senses start going off: (This little guy comes from Modern Tots, and I first saw it on Modmom's blog.)My boys would love to get their paws on this! We have a love of all things robot in AStink's house. It might even get my two year old to actually sit through an entire meal at the table...

PS -- Can I just say that I saw CStinkmum today, and she was totally Stinkerbelle! (This is a compliment...Looking fabulous, secretly dirty.) She was rocking this brown leather jacket with distressed/destroyed cuffs and trim, and James Jeans. It was an awesome outfit. There must be another term for looking totally stylish whilst being unshowered...hmm. Will have to think on it. I, on the otherhand, was actually freshly showered, and wearing sweats and filthy Uggs. How glamourous -- NOT! I was also out in public without my eyebrows penciled in so I must have been a scary sight as well!

My Rockstar Life...

Aaaah, the joys of motherhood...It's days like yesterday and last night that I need to remind myself of the big picture and not get mired down by the shit...and I'm talking literally...the shit! You see, my lil' Rowdy has the runs, and it's reached blow out proportions. So as I'm wiping up, washing down, and changing the 7th diaper in an hour, worrying about keeping him hydrated, and trying to recover from the 3:30AM wake up call he gave me with another blow out from his PJ's onto his mattress...I can't help but feel a bit incredulous over the situations that transpire in my daily life. I mean, it wasn't that long ago that I was attending runway shows in NY and living a life people read about in magazines...at least, in my mind it wasn't that long ago...even though I am starting to feel a bit fossil-ish...and here I am...a master at pooling poop management.

It's times like this when I am feeling SO NOT glamourous when all I can do is sigh and say to myself with not a touch of, but a big stinking diaper full of irony, "...my rockstar life!"

Botticelli Tresses and Undefinable Odors

Welcome, CStinkmum! - see post below - (applause track in background). So as usual, your wit and humor have bowled me over and made me have a great start to the day. You didn't just open the door to the blog, you kicked it wide open, and that's so great! I think that you should list your occupation in your profile as, Iconoclast. I knew CStinkmum would be a fab. blog partner because of her innate ability to shake things up. She always makes me think, and those are the best kinds of friends to have.

Today I am 'stink lite' : one day out from a shower...loving the undefinable odor that my hair is holding on to...but at least it looks sort of alright. Kind of bed head mess with a touch of bend to it...just don't get too close.

CStinkmum has a head full of long blonde wavy hair, the kind I've always wished for but never had. I toy with the idea of just perming the shit out of it and seeing what happens, but with all the dyeing and chemical processing, I'm afraid it would just snap off and leave me with a 1" long head of moss, like baby hair regrowth. I've got Venus on the half shell hair dreams...I am realizing this is my second post on hair so I will stop now.

CStink...having a family only, pizza party is the best kind of birthday party! She will have a great time! Give her a big ol' birthday hug from me and the stink puppies!

Stinkerbelle

Yesterday I was 'stinkerbelle', which, in Stink Mums' (SM) terms means, looking pretty, but actually dirty! C (the other half of the SM duo, will be up and posting soon) and I have our own SM language. When we have a moment, we'll post our terms and meanings to share, along with our Stink Mum philosophy, or way of life, so to speak.

We'll also put up a little bio/getting-to-know us post so you know where we're coming from. That's all for now.

Blow Out

I can't wait until the warm weather arrives. Being locked up all winter is giving me cabin fever! I know I must be bored because I did my annual, "cut myself some bangs" this morning. It's usually a two or three day process where I just keep snipping and snipping at my hair until it gets to be the way I like. I'm not saying it looks good, but at least it alleviates the boredom.

Speaking of hair cutting...I am now Rapunzel by the sea, with my hair reaching nearly to my butt. It's a result of sheer neglect mixed with fear. Ever since I left Manhattan...that was '98...I haven't been able to find a hairdresser that can cut my hair well. Ah, Michael from Mud Honey...why did I ever quit you?! You were worth staying in NY alone! I would walk into your salon and leave blissfully happy with Botticelli tresses! Since then, every salon I have gone to takes one look at me and my asian self...and cuts my hair bluntly. My hair tends to hang in stringy pieces and when cut bluntly, the ends take on the look of cut grass. No matter what pictures I show...no matter how much I emphasize soft layers...every single one of them takes one look at the slant of my eyes, and get all Benihana on me. I've chosen some places based on the cuts of other clients...and have still walked out looking landscaped.

Mud Honey Michael was a master with the shears...he layered me up so good! All of the others took a razor to me...I am beginning to wonder if these razor wielding hairstylists aren't being taught how to cut soft layers with scissors at beauty school...Otherwise...what's the deal?!